Chinese dining traditions have as long a history as the history of "Chinese Cooking". The Chinese people pride themselves on being one of the earliest peoples to develop sophisticated notions of polite social interaction, including highly sophisticated rules of etiquette governing acceptable table manners. Since 'wining and dining' guests is an old and esteemed tradition in China, it is not surprising that Chinese society has developed an intricate set of rules to govern also this delicate aspect of social interaction, where the potential to offend others is always present.

Chinese dining etiquette, whether it applies to receiving only a few guests at a single table in one's home or to holding a public banquet involving dozens of guests seated at several tables, varies with the character and purpose of the dinner. It also differs slightly from region to region in China. China's banquet etiquette is said to have originated from the Yili ("Etiquette and Ceremonials"), a work believed to have been penned by the Duke of Zhou during the Zhou (BCE 1027-221) Dynasty, though no independent mention of the book exists until the beginning of the Han (BCE 206 - CE 220) Dynasty. Through thousands of years of evolution, Chinese dining etiquette has continued to develop, albeit always with one foot in the traditions of the past.

The rules of Chinese dining etiquette - some of which are implicit though most are eminently explicit - cover such things as presenting oneself to the host (and presenting the host with a gift), the seating arrangement at a single table - as well as who sits at which table at a banquet - the "pecking order" of the toast (and the signal that dining may commence), and how to hold a rice bowl (as well as the Dos & Don'ts of serving oneself from a platter). Then there is a long list of elemenatary Don'ts that cover what might be termed "good table manners" in any civilized society, but which we will elegantly pass over here under the assumption that the reader requires no pointers in this this is not real things.

Reception Formalities

• *   Guests should present themselves to the host upon arrival. This is important since it is the host who determines the seating arrangement, and in order to do this properly, the host needs to know whom among the invited guests actually arrived.


• *   If one is more or less a stranger to the other guests and needs introducing, the host will generally take care of this, either personally, or by delegating this function to an appointed person.


• *   Be punctual - it is rude in Chinese society to arrive late (in French society, in contrast, it is almost rude to be punctual, since Frenchmen rarely are "on schedule" - i.e., they almost invariably need an additional 15-20 minutes to get things squared away before the guests begin to appear).


• *   One may bring a small gift if one is a low-ranking guest (a stranger or a near-stranger, a distant relative, etc.) while one brings a finer gift such as a bottle of quality wine if one is a higher-ranking guest.

TOPThe Seating Arrangement

When called to table by the host, guests take the places assigned to them by the host. The order of the seating on the part of the host is somewhat complicated and follows strict rules. The first rule governs the guest of honor, who, if not a special guest for the occasion in question (eg., a specially invited person), is the eldest member of the family. In ordinary family get-togethers, the guest of honor is always the eldest member of the family. The guest of honor always occupies what in the American Wild West might have been termed the "Wild Bill Hickock Seat", i.e., the seat that affords the most comprehensive view of the other guests as well as the best view of the entrance door to the room.* If there is no seat facing the entrance door, then the "central" seat facing eastward is the seat of honor (the "central" seat is the center seat facing eastward if a round table, an end seat if a rectangular table, etc.).

The second general rule is that the seating order proceeds in accordance with one's "social ranking", even as regards family get-togethers, though this is generally handled subtly within families, where "social ranking" might as easily refer to the degree of familial closeness of the guest to the host (where close family members of course rank higher than distant ones). In contrast, respect for objectively verifiable social ranking in the seating arrangement at impersonal banquets is religiously followed, without subtleties.

The seats closest to the guest of honor are filled by guests with the highest rank. There is no particular ranking of right-side versus left-side seats (this itself offers the host a certain amount of flexibility w.r.t. the seating of guests), only that the closer the "row" is to the guest of honor, the higher the rank of its occupants. The guest of honor occupies the first seat. Seats on the left-hand side are numbered second, fourth, sixth, etc., while seats on the right-hand side are numbered third, fifth, seventh, etc. Thus the first and most prestigious "row" of seats consists of seat numbers two and three.

At a banquet where the guests occupy several separate tables, the guest of honor and the highest-ranking ordinary guests occupy the table with the same "centrality" aspect as applies in the single-table case (or where multiple tables form a single, connected row). Similarly, the right and left table "rows" closest to the table occupied by the guest of honor are filled by ordinary guests who rank just below the ordinary guests who share the guest of honor's table, the second "row" of tables is filled by the next rank of ordinary guests, and so on and so forth.

Even within a given social ranking, the host at a banquet will strive to mix the guests in such as way as to foster good conversation while paying special attention to guests in need of it. The importance of the seating arrangement to Chinese dining etiquette cannot be overstressed, as violations would risk offending almost everyone present but the person or persons wrongly favored. Therefore accidents of this nature are disappearingly rare.

TOPThe First Toast and the Signal to Dine

A corollary to the respect shown to the guest of honor in the seating arrangement is the rule that the guest of honor "breaks the ice" by taking the first drink or by proposing the first toast, just as it is the guest of honor who is the first to begin eating. As to the mechanics of the first toast, the guest of honor raises his glass first, then the first "row", the second "row", etc., down the line as each "row" raises its glasses until the last "row" is reached, whereupon everyone drinks at the same time, possibly to a special toast.

Generally, the guest of honor will invite everyone to commence eating with words to the effect of "Shall we eat?" This gesture of politeness serves as a signal to the other guests that they may then commence dining. It is unforgivably rude to commence eating before the guest of honor has begun to eat, so although the guest of honor invites the assembled guests to begin dining, no one does so until the guest of honor has taken the first bite.

These "pecking orders" are faithfully observed in Chinese dining etiquette.

TOPHow to Hold a Rice Bowl and How to "Help Yourself"

To hold a rice bowl politely (and yes, you do indeed take the rice bowl in your hand rather than let it remain on the table as in Western dining etiquette), your thumb should rest on the rim of the bowl while the bottom of the bowl is supported by your index, middle, and ring fingers. The more polite the company the more lightly is your grip on the bowl (supporting the base of the bowl with your fingertips rather than snugging your fingers around the base of the bowl is considered more delicate).

When helping yourself to food placed on the table (on platters, etc.), always take from the side nearest you. It is considered ill-mannered to take food from the side of the platter facing others, and it is considered outright uncouth to "dig for treasures" as the Chinese put it, or to "cherry pick" for choice morsels as one would say in English.

There are, as indicated in the introduction, a number of elementary Don'ts regarding proper Chinese dining etiquette, but anyone from any society who has been brought up to observe ordinary good table manners will not fall victim to these Don'ts, therefore they need not be repeated here. If you observe the above short set of rules of Chinese dining etiquette (if in doubt, mimic others whom you sense know how to comport themselves in such situations), and if you have learned the essence of good table manners in your own country, then you need not fear that you will "stumble" as a dinner guest in China.

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* When drinking and/or playing poker, Wild Bill Hickock always sat in the farthest corner of the room facing the entrance so as not to be gunned down from behind by a lesser capacity (in fact, Wild Bill Hickock met his untimely death at the hands of a scoundrel precisely on just such an occasion, i.e., when he failed to observe this simple, self-imposed rule). Wild Bill Hickock was a first-rate "gunslinger" though perhaps an average poker player.